Willow Tree

This is the last post of the day; perhaps my last post period; or the last one anyone will read, having, after reading this, deemed me crazy. But I feel a strong urge to write. And I'm just going to write, without correction, close my eyes and post.

Ever since I was a child, a young child, I don't know of what age, I felt this fear about me, that the only place I was safe, as a Jew, was Israel. The Holocaust was not overly stressed to me--- my family did not die in the holocaust. All were in the USA. But, I don't know why, there was in me, since a very young age, the feeling that it wouldn't last long. That something, I don't know what, was to occurr in America and it wouldnn't be safe.

9/11 did not drive us here. I did not come because of what happened that day. It didn't really impact that way on me. Yes, I was terriifed and upset and mournful and enraged, but that wasn't it. I always felt that wayy. I thought I was crazy. I thought it me.

But more and more I'm hearing people echo my thoughts in one way or another. Not directly, not the same way. Just a fear creeping in to other's conversations.

I really am worried. I am really worried for every Jew, whether my direct family or not, who live outside of Israel.

Oh I am not claiming prescients. I have no great fame in that direction. Idon't reember a slew of dreams that have occurred that came true. I usually can't tell who is on line before I pick it up. I can't tell you what I think will happen, it is just fear. And the fear isn't for those who aren't Jewish, but then I am Jewish and that is how my feelings may be directed.

So, like I said, closing my eyes and going to post here's a plea; if you really can't make it to Israel now, please be aware, keep your eyes open. Be ready.

I love my family and I love my friends and I fear for them. And if you want to call me crazy that's okay, but the fear is there, and I wouldn't speak if the love wasn't there also.

Posted by Rachel Ann at September 29, 2004 12:35 PM