Willow Tree

What it is

So, like I said,

Monkey's been sick. I thought Thurday-Friday was it. Then Shabbat she threw up in my hair. This was an interesting wake up call, to say the least. But then during the day she was well. Night sick, day well. She gets tired in the afternoon, doesn't want to eat much, psuhes food away and sleeps. But during the day, fine as can be.

I key into weird little symptoms; her hands redder than normal, her snoring, the way she sleeps, different than normal. And I worry.

Does this mean more than I think it does? I both dismiss and worry about these little things, laughing at myself as I picture myself tearful in the hospital as a doctor lambasts me for ignorning a symptom every thinking person would know indicates some horrible disease that requires prompt and immediate attention to prevent catastrophe.

And I laugh at myself because I know no such scenario is likely to take place. She has a virus. She is getting better everyday. Each evening there is less of a fever. she sleeps easier. There is nothing horrific or terrifying about this illness; it is common virus, following the pattern of many viruses; something is going around, and she will, like all the other children and adults in the area get over it, if not by morning, by the next morning.

She is fine.

Except she is MY daughter, MY child.

So I worry, and laugh at myself for worrying, and worry still..

Which is normal too.

Posted by Rachel Ann at January 30, 2005 09:45 PM